Received this recently:

We have initiated a Women for Shared Parenting project.  A number of prominent women are forming a group to endorse a statement supporting shared parenting.  The project is in the early development stage, with statement drafting just getting underway.   The group is bi-partisan consisting of female legislators, business leaders, journalists, etc, all of whom support shared parenting.  Presently over 50  prominent women have been identified as participants and are in the process of being contacted.  

Ultimately the idea is to have the statement translate into a website where women from around the United States and Canada sign on as endorsers.  We expect the initial group may also post two minute video statements on why they are supporting shared parenting, etc.   We will also pursue Op Ed pieces in influential newspapers.  There will be very little time commitment necessary on your part.  

Following are several women who’ve already responded, requesting their inclusion in the project.  

Barbara Kay – Canadian National Post syndicated columnist  http://news.nationalpost.com/2012/01/24/post-ebook-no-5-best-of-barbara-kay-vol-i/  

Molly Olson – Minneapolis, MN. Founder – Center for Parental Responsibility (CPR)  http://www.cpr-mn.org/

Dr. Linda Nielsen – Social Scientist, Author, Adolescent and Educational Psychologist, Wake Forest Universityhttp://users.wfu.edu/nielsen/

Kris Titus - Founder, former President – Canadian Equal Parenting Council – national Canadian shared parenting umbrella organization http://canadianepc.org/

Before any statement is publicly released it will be privately circulated to all who indicated a desire to participate for their input.  We anticipate the statement may be tailored as a broad policy statement in order to attract the greatest level of support.

We would be interested in being introduced to  any Prominent Women Leaders who would appreciate hearing about this endeavor.  I can be contacted with the information below. 

Kind Regards,

Terry Brennan

tbrennan211@msn.com

Just received this notice:

My name is Khaaliq Thomas and I’m a professional photographer and custodial dad of 3 (recently divorced).
For the past year I’ve been working on a photo documentary concentrating on single / custodial fathers households.
I’m hoping to get your help in spreading the word about the project.

Purpose of The Project
The project will challenge the belief of fathers being incapable, unwilling, and or inadequate in performing responsibly,
productively and lovingly as a single / custodial parent. I currently have 3 participants and need another 3 to 4 for a
truly diverse look into these unconventional family structures. Attention will be given to the dedicated ability of these
dads and their commitment to raising productive children and supplying a stable home on their own. The finished project
will consist of a 110 page full color photo book. I’m using Kickstarter to raise the funds to search for more dads through
advertising, print and design of the book and setting up exhibitions of the final project.

How You Can Help
I need your help in spreading the word about the Kickstarter fundraiser in order to get the project to the public and
share in the experience of a single father household through this project. I’m asking for your help in support of the project
by spreading the word on your website, (or anyway you can), and allowing me to add you as a supporter on Kickstarter.
I plan on launching the Kickstarter fundraiser early March or whenever I have enough support, whichever comes first.
A link to a video introduction of the project is included.

Thx for your time -

http://vimeo.com/36229020

Fathers are still showing up at legislative hearings to demand more time with their children.  Opponents often argue that increasing time with fathers could lead to less child support being paid, and so argue that fathers shouldn’t get more time.  Unbelievable, isn’t it?

McCOOK, Nebraska — Wednesday’s legislative session at the Capitol in Lincoln, Nebraska, saw extensive testimony focusing on Gov. Dave Heineman’s proposed tax changes, while another topic was nearly as effective at stimulating speakers. According to Sen. Mark Christensen two rooms were also filled with speakers wanting to testify on father’s and grandparent’s rights.

Sen. Christensen told members of the McCook Area Chamber of Commerce that LB 22 and LB 212 saw extensive testimony about splitting parenting time, with opponents worrying the changes would reduce child support obligations in place.

“I was amazed at how many dads came in and said they didn’t care about child support, keep it the same, they just wanted to have more time with their kids,” said Christensen.

McCook Daily Gazette: Local News: Tax proposals, fathers’ rights topic for chamber legislative call (02/07/13).

These types of bills have always foundered when the lawyers and special interest lawyers start weighing in.  Also, courts are loathe to give up any discretion, especially in cases of disputed custody.

 More than a quarter of our kids are being raised by just one parent. Some Heartland fathers feel like they don’t have the parenting rights they deserve. Two Nebraska state lawmakers are trying to change that.

Joe Trader thought he had all the evidence he needed in the custody hearing for his daughter Gracie; but the judge decided otherwise. “I wasn’t going to let a decision that has been given to fathers for years determine what kind of father i was going to be able to be to my child.”

Up before the unicameral this year are two bills focusing on father’s rights.

State Senator Galen Hadley’s bill wants to bring laws made years ago up to today’s times. “I think this bill is looking more at modern society and trying to come up with a parenting plan that tries to deal with the kind of conditions we find in modern divorce.”

Senator Russ Karpisek wants to go one step further; holding judges accountable for the decisions they make.

Trader says both bills show progress. “Any benefit, any increase in time or really any acknowledgment of the equal parenting an how important it is a huge stride,” he said.

Trader’s main goal is for more time with his little girl, Gracie. “Let Nebraska know we’re tired of being just child support, we want to be parents.”

One of the bill would also make it so each parent is entitled to at least 45% of the year spent with their child. That could be over-turned, but a judge would have to cite a reason why.

Father’s Rights Debate Taken Up By The State Legislature.

This issue always gets debated, and then just dropped.

With attention fully on the Vikings stadium issue, a bill that would change child custody proceedings for divorcing parents in Minnesota is quietly inching its way closer to the governor’s desk.

The latest version of HF322 would simply increase the presumed time each divorcing parent would get with his or her kids from 25 percent to 35 percent. (The remaining 30 percent of time would be figured out through mediation or divorce proceedings.) The Senate held a second reading of the bill Monday.

Rep. Peggy Scott, R-Andover, had initially authored the bill with more complex reforms that would affect the calculations of child support payments. She also wanted to create a presumption of true shared custody — at 45.1 percent for each parent. The bill also included a new concept for Minnesota law – virtual parenting time — and would have required courts to consider the use of wireless and video technology to help children remain connected to both of their parents. A version of her bill with these provisions passed the House last month by an 80-53 vote.

Those concepts don’t exist in the bill before the Senate. While Scott said that was somewhat disappointing, she would be happy with the passage of a bill that would take an incremental step toward shared custody. The percentages in law are just starting points for negotiations. But Scott said she felt 25 percent is too low, and encourages parents to fight too much in divorce proceedings to claim the remaining time with their children. A presumption of shared custody, she argued, would compel more constructive negotiations.

Not everyone agrees. In committee hearings, opponents argued that a presumption of shared custody is unrealistic and potentially harmful if it requires children to ping-pong back and forth between parents too much. They argued that a move toward shared custody might be easier on parents, but might not necessarily be in the best interests of their kids.

I notice that a lot of attorneys don’t see and increase.

CHICAGO, May 8, 2012 — /PRNewswire/ – This Mother’s Day, it appears that an increasing number of moms will be setting aside time to sign child support and alimony checks.   Overall, 56% of the nation’s top divorce attorneys say that they have seen an increase in the number of mothers paying child support during the past three years, while 47% also note a rise in women being responsible for alimony throughout the same time period, according to a recent survey of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers (AAML).

“The court system always ends up reflecting changes in our society and this is certainly the case with issues regarding who pays child support and alimony,” said Ken Altshuler, president of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers.  “As more women achieve success on their career paths, they are also finding themselves increasingly responsible for financial obligations during and after the divorce process.”

In all, 56% of AAML members cited an increase in mothers who pay child support, while 44% said no change, and there was not an observed decrease.   Additionally, 47% have noticed an increase in the number of women paying alimony, while 53% said no change.

Read more here: http://www.sacbee.com/2012/05/08/4474906/more-women-paying-child-support.html#storylink=cpy

Another tragedy brought to you from the divorce courts of America.  If divorce and custody issues were handled from the perspective of parental rights to children, instead of best interest, these kinds of events would be fewer, since there would be less opportunity for enmity to escalate.

(Reuters) – A man California prosecutors say shot his ex-wife and seven other people to death in a Seal Beach hair salon in revenge over a child custody dispute was charged on Friday with first degree murder in their deaths.

Scott Evans Dekraai, 42, who is accused of carrying out the largest mass murder in the history of Orange County, was also charged with a single count of attempted murder, Orange County District Attorney Tony Rackauckas told a news conference in Santa Ana.

The lone survivor of Wednesday’s shooting rampage at Salon Meritage, 73-year-old Harriet Stretz, remains in critical condition at a hospital in nearby Long Beach.

An emotional Rackauckas announced he would seek the death penalty against Dekraai, who he said was targeting former wife Michelle Fournier, a stylist at Salon Meritage, in the shooting rampage.

“There are some crimes that are so depraved, so callous, so malignant, that there is only one punishment that will fit the crime,” Rackauckas said. “When a person in a case such as this goes on a rampage and kills innocent people in an indiscriminate bloody massacre, I will seek the death penalty.”

Dekraai made an initial court appearance on Friday afternoon, wearing a yellow Orange County Jail jumpsuit and handcuffs and shackled at the waist as he sat in a caged area.

Orange County Superior Court Judge Erick Larsh agreed to a request by Dekraai’s lawyer, Robert Curtis, to postpone the arraignment until November 28 so Curtis can assemble a defense team.

Curtis also asked the judge to order to ensure that Dekraai was given his medications, including two anti-psychotic drugs. Larsh said he could only order jail doctors to “do what is appropriate” for Dekraai’s medical conditions.

‘I HATE YOU!’

As Dekraai was being taken out of court, a woman in the audience shouted “I hate you! I hate you!” toward his back. Another man clutched a picture to his chest.

Prosecutors say Dekraai, who divorced Fournier, 48, in 2007 and was still battling her in court over custody of their young son, wanted revenge when he stormed into Salon Meritage and began shooting.

The former couple had been in court over the child custody issues on Tuesday and Rackauckas said the hearing apparently “didn’t go very well” for Dekraai. He said Dekraai and Fournier had argued over the phone on the morning of the rampage.

“We believe that the defendant committed this unimaginable act of violence because he wanted to kill his ex-wife over a custody dispute over their 8-year-old son,” Rackauckas said. “He was willing to end any life in his path, and he did.”

via Accused Seal Beach gunman sought revenge: prosecutor | Reuters.

Most fathers new to the divorce scene have no clue as to just how precarious their relationship with their own children really is.  It can be stripped from them by the stroke of a judges pen, just because mommy checked some little box on a form that said there was abuse in the home.  They don’t get that the assumption is that it is the father who is guilty of abuse, when as often as not, it is in fact the mother herself who is really the abusive and manipulative one.

Advocates explain that the leverage gained by a divorcing spouse who falsely accuses her spouse of abusing children or herself leads to a denial of due legal process to the victim of those lies.

September 04, 2011 /24-7PressRelease/ — The divorce process presents tremendous challenges for spouses who face questions about parental fitness or financial improprieties. One issue frequently raised by a spouse is serious accusations of domestic violence followed by petitions for restraining orders. Even if the abuse claim is shown to have been backed by false accusations, tremendous damage to an innocent person’s reputation may have already occurred.

Because spousal or child abuse claims are most frequently leveled against husbands by wives, fathers’ rights groups have sought help from Florida legislators to create legal consequences for those make false accusations in divorce cases. Advocates explain that the leverage gained by a spouse who falsely accuses her spouse of abusing children or herself leads to a denial of due legal process to the victim of those lies.

One national model for reform is the Partner Violence Reduction Act, which seeks to better distinguish the consequences of an allegation from a judicial finding, while making existing domestic violence laws more gender-inclusive. The most important goal seen by many is reducing the incentive for abuse of the legal process, because too many participants in family law disputes recognize that such allegations can be particularly powerful in the divorce context.

via Florida Fathers’ Rights Update: Legal Reforms for False Abuse Claims? – U.S. Politics Today – News Media Monitoring.

This type of commentary has been circulating since the 1990s, and even before.  Some embittered mom rants on the father for abandoning his family.  Most of the time, however, when you find the father and ask him, you get an entirely different story.  Why is it that these women are believed, and the fathers aren’t.  Without exception, many fathers I have known and dealt with, have been worn down by a system that looks to them for nothing more than money.  They are stripped of all rights to their children, they are denigrated in court and in the media, and they find no support anywhere.

I love how these types of women (so called mothers) who don’t see that she has managed to teach her children to either hate or disparage their own father.  Good mom.  She should be proud of herself.  Why can’t we criticize her for failing to do her part to keep the father in the lives of the children.  Obviously, she failed in this tiny duty, miserably.

We don’t celebrate Father’s Day at our house. My three sons dread the advertising-soaked holiday the way many singles loathe Valentine’s Day. It’s not that they have lost their father to death, disease, military service, an act of God or misfortune of any stripe. It is that their father has chosen to lose them.

As it is for many fatherless families across the globe, this Sunday is a reminder that fatherhood should be more than a biological feat; it is a primal moral responsibility and one that many men regrettably fail to fulfill. Still, there is a remedy.

via Father’s Day should be a reminder of paternal responsibility – Chicago Tribune.

Here is some commentary on the Thomas Ball case.

If you don’t know the story by now, Thomas Ball is the New Hampshire man who set himself on fire on the courthouse steps and left a 15-page note outlining the abusive family court system and his reasons for killing himself. Many of you have emailed or commented about this case (thanks very much) here and I think his story is an important one in understanding the psychological and physical damage that the law is inflicting on men in this country. Here is an excerpt from Mr. Ball’s statement that I think makes some very salient points:

I am due in court the end of the month. The ex-wife lawyer wants me jailed for back child support. The amount ranges from $2,200. to $3,000. depending on who you ask. Not big money after being separated over ten years and unemployed for the last two. But I do owe it. If I show up for court without the money and the lawyer say jail, then the judge will have the bailiff take me into custody. There really are no surprises on how the system works once you know how it actually works. And it does not work anything like they taught you in high school history or civics class.

I could have made a phone call or two and borrowed the money. But I am done being bullied for being a man. I cannot believe these people in Washington are so stupid to think they can govern Americans with an iron fist. Twenty-five years ago, the federal government declared war on men. It is time now to see how committed they are to their cause. It is time, boys, to give them a taste of war.

I saw over at Antifeminist tech blog that some are trying to cover up this story, while others, such as man-hater Amanda Marcotte said that Bell’s goal was to use his fiery death to “make his ex-wife’s life a living hell.” This twisted “analysis” is hardly worthy of a response, but I will say that if Ball wanted to make his ex’s life a living hell, killing himself was not the answer. The ex may not have even given a damn.

To read the entire article:

via My take on the Thomas Ball case | Dr. Helen Smith.