St. Paul Pioneer Press | 07/19/2005 | Nothing succeeds like enforcement
MARK YOST

Minnesota needs more prosecutors like Kevin O’Laughlin.

Earlier this year, the assistant Winona County attorney prosecuted 24-year-old Sara Fay Peterson, who illegally took her daughter from the girl’s grandmother, who had legal custody. Peterson, who triggered an Amber Alert that cost the state nearly $7,000, eventually pleaded guilty to a felony offense of deprivation of custodial or parental rights.

“It wasn’t so much about the expense [of the Amber Alert], but about the violation of the order of the court and protection of the child,” said O’Laughlin, whose office has prosecuted other such cases but admits they’re rare.

Too bad other city and county attorneys don’t think the same way. All too often custodial parents — usually a mother — repeatedly deny the noncustodial parent — usually the father — visitation. The problem, according to family-law attorneys, prosecutors and advocacy groups, is that civil-court judges don’t like to get involved in family-law cases, even where there’s a clear case of contempt of court.

“Most judges don’t even want to hear the cases,” said Molly Olson, volunteer executive director of the Center for Parental Responsibility, a local fathers’ rights group. It’s also very hard to prove that something didn’t happen; i.e. the kids weren’t dropped off, didn’t show up for dinner, etc.

“The burden of proof is very high and it’s all on the fathers,” Olson said.

There’s the added problem that many city and county attorneys don’t like to bring these contempt cases before civil-court judges because they have to try other cases before them. That’s particularly frustrating for fathers who are repeatedly denied court-ordered visitation.

It has been more than a year since Mike Beach, 49, of St. Paul has seen his sons, who live in Golden Valley with their mother.

“My ex-wife has made it uncomfortable for them to visit,” Beach said.

What’s even more frustrating is that he never had relationship problems with his sons until custody became an issue. That’s not uncommon. Parents often use children as a pressure point to get other things during and after a divorce, such as increased child or spousal support.

Beach went so far as to have the Golden Valley police go to his ex-wife’s home to help him pick up the kids. When his case went back to court, he was rebuked for being “too aggressive.”

“The more times you go back, the harder they push back,” he said.

Beach’s ex-wife did not return a call for comment.

Pat Reimer, 38, of South Maplewood, is supposed to get a daily phone call from his kids, who live with their mother in Mound. He also has a right-of-first-refusal clause in his divorce decree, meaning that if the mother is gone for eight hours or more Reimer is the first choice over baby-sitters and relatives to watch the kids, even when it’s not during his court-appointed parenting time. Even though he learned that his kids were frequently staying with their grandparents, his court-appointed visitation expediter told him he didn’t have much of a chance going back to the judge. Reimer’s ex-wife, too, did not return a call for comment.

One guy who has had some success is Michael Fry, 36, of Bayport. That’s because Jeff Stender, a Stillwater police investigator, has worked with Ed Wunsch, a private investigator who specializes in child abduction (www.parentalabduction.org).

“He instilled in me the difficulties that noncustodial parents — usually dads — face,” said Stender. As a result, Stender listened to Fry’s complaint, something police officers often do, and then agreed to investigate it further, something they don’t always do.

“It is hard to prove,” said Fry. “I was doing pickups at her house. The police knocked on the door, no one answered. They refused to come out; refused to answer the phone.”

Fry’s testimony and Stender’s collaboration were enough to persuade the Stillwater attorney to file a contempt charge against the custodial mother. Although the case was settled out of court, it’s unique that it even got that far. Fry said he hasn’t had repeated visitation problems since the case and sees his children so often that “it’s like having joint custody.”

“Often, when police officers are called to assist, we simply see it as two divorced parents fighting,” said Stender. “But over the last three or four years, I’ve started to look at it a little differently.”

Minnesota needs more investigators like Stender, too.

Yost is associate editor of the Pioneer Press editorial page. Write him at myost@pioneerpress.com or at the Pioneer Press, 345 Cedar St., St. Paul, MN 55101.